Clown hysteria hits Canberra – This is not a drill
by Brent Ford
You may have seen over the weekend that a ‘clown craze’ has swept across the U.S and parts of Australia.
It involves people dressing up as clowns and scaring innocent people, some say it started as part of a promotion for a new adaptation of the clown thriller ‘It’ but the studio that is producing the film has denied those allegations.
Horror legend himself Stephen King has weighed in on the hysteria.
“Hey, guys, time to cool the clown hysteria — most of em are good, cheer up the kiddies, make people laugh,” King tweeted.
It seemed that we would be safe in Canberra, but unfortunately it is not the case, with a mysterious Facebook page popping up over the weekend.
The page titled ‘The Clown Purge Canberra’ had this to say with their opening message:
Obviously they don’t teach grammar at Clown College. (I joke, I joke please don’t eat me)
If you thought you had time to prepare, you don’t, Lily from Curtin called to report a possible clown sighting in Curtin.
“I was in my street in Curtin and it was about half past 10 at night,” Lily said.
“I was just driving home and I saw this guy walking up the street very fast for 10:30 at night.
“He had no lights, no torch on him and he had that sort of serial killer limp going on. I just drove home locked the doors and went to bed, I was very scared.”
I for one welcome our new clown overlords. So ahead of our impending doom, here are a few clowns that would ten out of ten scare you.
1. The Poltergeist Clown
Seriously, what sort of parent would buy that for their children? You’re just asking for it. Just get them a gift certificate next time.
The clown of the moment and perhaps the decade, Twisty terrifies audiences in the American Horror stories series. He is the most recent adaptation on the classic ‘horror clown’.
3. The Joker
A controversial selection, known as the Clown Prince of Crime, The Joker is a lying psychopath and criminal mastermind from the DC Universe. The Heather Ledger adaptation is absolutely frightening, an iconic character, who has been listed as one of the greatest fictitious characters ever created.
Pennywise the Dancing Clown or Bob Gray is the character out of Stephen King’s 1986 novel ‘It’. The character is a demonic entity that preys on children in the fictitious town of Derry, through a variety of powers that include the ability to shapeshift, manipulate, and possess. Pennywise has been the cause of many sleepless nights, and is set to hit the big screen again with a new adaptation coming out in 2017.
5. John Gacy – The Killer Clown
One of history’s most notorious and evil serial killers was actually a former clown. He went by the name of Pogo the Clown, after being convicted of multiple murders was sentenced to the death penalty, before his death he painted artworks that depicted himself as Pogo, with some going for as many as $20,000.
This tweet pretty much sums it all up.
Clowns terrorizing the streets. A real life billionaire villain running for President. We need you, Batman.— Nick Diener (@nickdiener) October 4, 2016