17 Things Nobody Tells You About Giving Birth
Giving birth is a beautiful, life-altering act that be a woman's defining point - it's also the most painful, uncomfortable thing you'll ever go through.
It could accurately be described as the worst and best day of your life.
Here are 17 things that anyone who has ever given birth won't tell you...
#1: Your water doesn't just 'break' into a little puddle at your feet. It's actually a slower, more gradual flow, kind of like peeing yourself.
#2: It may break more than once! It's not water, it's the fluid that forms a protective sac around your baby - and can keep trickling out all day!
#3: If your water doesn't break naturally, a doctor will break it for you. With an uncomfortable hook thing, kind of like they use in a pap smear.
#4: You don't need to rush to the hospital as soon as your water breaks. It could still be HOURS until contractions start and your cervix dilates. Not like seahorses, seahorses have it easy - they just puff out and there you have it, BABY seahorses!
#5: There are a few things you can't do once your water breaks, like run around or have sex. Without the amniotic sac protecting the bub could get an infection. Within 24 hours of your water breaking labor will start naturally or a doctor will induce it with drugs.
#6: Contractions could be the worst part of the whole thing. Even worse than the pushing - so it's important to have your breathing right.
#7: Getting an epidural is like legally being on ecstasy. He numbs the area before inserting a needle into your spine, then magically your contractions start and you can have a lemonade with an umbrella and do a crossword as your baby is being delivered.
#8: You'll feel like you'll need to do a number two. It's the baby pressing on your entire nether region, but be warned - if there's anything in there to come out - it's going to come out. The good part? You actually won't care. Not one little bit.
#9: Your doctor may not be the one who delivers your bub. If your doctor splits hospital rounds like some do, you could have a good chance of getting your doctor, but it's a good question to ask and be prepared for in case your doctor falls into that category.
#10: Your doctor may snip you, just a little bit. This sound TERRIBLE I know, but the good news is this method is a bit ancient now and doesn't happen anymore. If you're mentally scarred, never, ever google 'episiotomy'.
#11: The doctor may 'suck' the baby out with a vacuum. Seriously.
#12: After giving birth you'll also have to deliver the placenta. Just one more push should it.
#13: There will most probably be stitches. Either due to #10 happening to you, or maybe due to a slight natural tear during the whole pushing a lemon through a pin hole ordeal.
#14: There'll also be blood. It may feel like people are mopping up a crime scene, because in essence, they are.
#15: You'll meed to wear a nappy of sorts. It's kind of like a giant maxi pad, really.
#16: You essentially have your period for a good six weeks after birth. More maxi pads, please!
#17: You'll block all of this out roughly 3 months after birth! Otherwise, how would you ever have another child?
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