I knew there would be challenges working from home. Communication, remote access to files, remembering to step away from the computer to get some sunshine. But as my home becomes my office, and the lines between where I relax and where I get my work done become blurry and obsolete, I’ve found that there is something I was not prepared for: the worst co-worker I’ve ever shared an office with.
My cat, Hazel.
Sure, she may look like an innocent enough employee, but someone forgot to read the fine print on her resume. She’s a menace.
Here are a few reasons why my cat, Hazel, is the worst co-worker.
- She always steals the good chair
I’ll be typing away at my keyboard, when all of a sudden, it hits me: tea! I get up, head to the kitchen and hit the jug, but when I return to my desk to wait for the jug to boil, I find a usurper on my chair. And it’s not just that she takes the chair, it’s the way she looks at me afterwards. ‘What are you going to do about it?’ I hear her think. ‘Nothing, that’s what.’
- She spends hours with the receptionist from the office next door.
Sure, there may be a window between them, but that won’t stop Hazel spending a good two hours of the workday with the cat from next door. And it’s not like she does it at the end of the day, close to five. She does it first thing in the morning. Those are prime working hours, but do you think she cares?
- She takes extra long lunches.
Hazel watched one episode of Rick Steves Europe, and now every lunch is a siesta. Lounging in the sun, ignoring her emails. Wait ‘til HR finds out.
- I’m pretty sure she’s stealing supplies
Now I ain’t no snitch, but all my pens keep disappearing, and curiously, she always seems to have a new one to chew. Oh sure, she could have just ordered her own, but I call shenanigans. Shenanigans!
I don’t know how long I’ll be working from home, but I doubt anything’s going to change. At least once it hits 5 p.m., she’s pretty cute. She’s cuddly, loving, and only wants to rip my head off some of the time.
From one fur-baby home to all you others out there, here’s to our loving pets, and our terrible, terrible co-workers.